January 2008

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Many Hats

January 31, 2008 in Shameless Plugs | View Comments

I've been playing all week with Gmail's signature feature using Greasemonkey and a new HTML Signature script. Basically, it lets my emails have a different personality based on which address I'm using. I wear many hats on the internet, so this sort of thing appeals to me.

My many hats include the blogger hat, the author hat, the promo ho hat, the webmaster hat, and the reader hat.

press hatThe Blogger
Every day, I bring you the latest and greatest in my life, hot off the presses. I'm kind of a journalist that way, though the headlines are easy to hunt down when they're all mine.


writer hatThe Author
I maintain a web presence for my many (snort) fans so that you'll know what I've written and what's coming up.


graduation capThe Promo Ho
I teach other eBook authors how to market for free or cheap on the internet. Hey, I gotta learn it anyway, so I might as well share. For people who are new to marketing and/or the internet, eBook marketing can be daunting!


hard hatThe Webmaster
I keep my local writers' group website updated and running smoothly-- and with so many authors wearing their author hats and promoting their patoots off via the website, sometimes it's not too easy!




boy readingThe Reader
Finally, I get to settle down and share with my other reader friends what books I'm enjoying (or not enjoying, rarely). This is one of my favorite parts because I read a lot of books based on recommendations, so I like to sort of pay it forward for other people looking for a good book.

What hats do you wear on the internet or elsewhere?

How to Eat French Onion Soup

January 30, 2008 in Laugh Til You Pee | View Comments

French onion soup, delicious but messy1. Forget you are on a date or at an important business lunch, and order French onion soup anyway.
2. Panic slightly when the server brings out your soup and you realize you have made a bad choice.
3. Delicately poke at the top layer of gooey cheese until some broth pops through.
4. Spoon up some broth for a cheese-less bite.
5. Refrain from cursing when the cheese thwarts you and sticks to the bottom of the spoon despite your best laid plans to get a cheese-less bite.
6. Start over. This time, scoop up a corner of broken-off cheese, some broth, and a piece of bread. Attempt to slice the cheese with the edge of your spoon against the side of the bowl.
7. Hope important person across from you doesn't notice the strings of cheese hanging off your spoon, and put the bite in your mouth anyway.
8. Refrain from cursing because the cheese is hothotohlordhot.
9. Sneakily pick off strings of hot cheese still hanging from your mouth.
10. Repeat until you are finished with the soup, your date leaves, or your boss fires you, whichever comes first.

Post-Marriage Spread

January 29, 2008 in Husband Wisdom, My Wide Bum | View Comments

Before marriage, this is how life works: You get stuff done that you need to get done, you do your work, you enjoy your leisure activities, you exercise and wear make-up in case you happen to run smack into your soulmate at the supermarket, and you eat when you feel like it.

When you start dating, things begin to go downhill. You still exercise and wear make-up because what if your potential soulmate never sees that he's your soulmate because you got fat and ugly and he lost interest? But your dates usually revolve around food and you find yourself eating more than you've ever eaten in your life. No problem, you'll just run a few more minutes tomorrow morning.

Sonja's wedding dressAfter marriage, though, things get nasty. The wedding is over, you don't give a crap if your wedding dress fits anymore, you ate like a hog on your honeymoon, so what's one more cookie? Plus, your soulmate is stuck with you now, and he loves you, so he's not going to leave if you skip your eyeliner for a couple days. And eventually you find that you have outgrown your favorite pants, and you realize you wouldn't be able to get your wedding dress on with a shoehorn anymore, and maybe looking awesome just to net your soulmate is a bad idea.

So you decide to look awesome just for the sake of looking awesome.

Sonja lurrrves polish sausage sandwichesEasier said than done. That's where I am now. It's been years of abusing my poor metabolism into a sluggish submission. Years of my entire life revolving around when I eat-- I meet my husband for lunch, so if we don't eat, we don't see each other.

And I probably shouldn't give up just because it's taken me MONTHS to lose a mere few pounds. After all, it took me years to put them on, right?

That's what I keep telling myself. Marraige is awesome, but it's hell on the figure.

Pardon Me

January 28, 2008 in Blog Toys | View Comments

Please excuse my clutter while I mess with my blog template. I read an article over at Dandelionblog.com this weekend that inspired me to overhaul my blog a bit. You'll notice I've changed the title and the look and feel already. Let me know what you think so far. What do you miss that was here before? Any of the widgets you absolutely can't live without? Let me know. I'll put them back up.

The Great Hard Drive Adventure

January 22, 2008 in Pictures | View Comments

... complete with pictures.

So the other night, my hard drive started making noises like there was a teeny tiny ping pong game going on inside. Apparently in computer land, that is bad. Luckily, the little hard drive gnomes kept right on playing ping pong until I had a chance to back up all my data, and then my fantastically smart husband set out on a mission to replace my laptop hard drive.

First, he unscrewed many, many screws, and unlatched some thingie that took three different tools, a flashlight, and a lot of curse words before it finally came free.

Et voila.

I have never seen the inside of a laptop before (and I'm not sure I care to ever again), so if, like me, you also have never seen the inside of a laptop, I provide you with the above picture to slake your curiosity. Trust me, you should hope you never HAVE to see the inside of your laptop.

Then it was out with the old hard drive and in with the new.

And time to put all those screws back. Now where did they go again?

And now I'm back up and typing and enjoying my speedy, non-rattly new hard drive, and life is good.

If you're not interested in all this computer talk, here's a picture of my view out of the upstairs office window earlier this weekend, before all the snow (yeah, all like three quarters of an inch of it) melted.

Have you ever heard the rule of three thing before? I've usually heard it in connection with deaths of famous people: they always happen in threes. Apparently it also works for household objects. Last week, our router died. Midweek, the coffee maker broke. And then exactly a week after the router died, my hard drive needed to be replaced. So hopefully we're done now and our poor credit card can get some well-deserved rest. Please tell me it's not a rule of fours for household objects. I fear for my electric toothbrush.
Sonja

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