Monthly Archives: April 2011

Royal Butts and Hats

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I’m usually not into royal stuff. Number 1, I’m an American. Number 2 (heh heh), I like fart jokes, so that automatically disbars me from anything royal. Number 3, I’m happy in my little unfamous world, where I can walk down the street without people rushing to immortalize on film every action, fashion choice, and time I scratch my butt.

But I got sucked into the royal wedding a little today. Mostly because I don’t think princes should scratch their butts, for real.

Oh Harry, you little scamp.

Also because princesses shouldn’t wear hats like this. I might be able to pull it off though.

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Stuff I’ll Never Wear (Unless my Legs Get Chopped Off in a Horrible Accident and Are Replaced with Rachel Bilson’s Legs)

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I’m somewhere in this weird nether-region between fashionable and unfashionable. I’ve always at least nominally tried to stay on top of things. In high school in the ’90s I did the whole flannel and oversized t-shirt thing. In college, I dressed like a college student: hoodie couture. And then I tried to assemble a fashionable work-appropriate wardrobe for my career-oriented 20s.

The thing is, there have always been items I am completely unwilling to try. Mini skirts were the thing a few years ago. Yeah, I totally skipped those. Skinny jeans are in right now and you will never see my giant thighs walking around in those things. Never. Sweater dresses? Nope. I looked like a puffy teddy bear. And I was ok with just letting those trends pass me by. No problem.

Every now and then, though, there’s a thing that’s in fashion that I really want to do, but just can’t. That whole jeans-tucked-into-tall-boots thing? I bought tall boots. I tucked my jeans into them. I looked semi-ridiculous and very upside-down triangle-y. But I did it anyway.

This summer, it’s maxi dresses.

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Gossip Girls

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Girls gossip. We just do. It’s part of conversation. But it’s kind of evil.

I was reminded of that today when some stuff I’d said made its way around. It wasn’t necessarily bad stuff, but it was stuff I hadn’t thought of getting back around to the person I’d said it about. It could easily have been something Very Bad, and then I would have to feel awful and regret ever saying it in the first place– to anyone.

So, I think I’m starting my 30 In My 30s List a few weeks early. (Haven’t given much thought to my 30 In My 30s List, but that will happen later.) This coming month, May, is going to be my month of gossip-less-ness. I’m going to work hard only to say things I wouldn’t mind the subject hearing from my own mouth. That includes movie stars, companies, etc. and includes anything I post on Twitter or Facebook or my blog.

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